Once upon a time, I knew drama well. It started with the father of my child, whom I had been with for eight years and engaged to, tell me he wasn’t ready to get married—the day I tried on wedding dresses. “The fairytale wasn’t supposed to end like this,” I thought. But perhaps I could get my storybook ending by continuing to live with him. Needless to say, it didn’t work out and I wasn’t sticking around to find out when his eventually would be.
The interesting part was that I had been saved since I was a teen. I knew right from wrong and yet I had premarital sex, a child out of wedlock and was “shacking up” with a man who was not my husband. I look back and shriek at how naive I was; yet, God continued to bless me in my mess. But one day I had enough. I told him he had to leave.
So what becomes of the brokenhearted? Some get bitter and have trust issues. Some move on and others get stuck and stay stuck. I moved on to a rebound; wrong answer again. In all of these cases, God took full advantage of my sin to lead me back to Him. It doesn’t matter what kind of drama it is or how deep you’re in it. Whether it’s court battles with an ex or disagreements with disobedient children; God can turn it around and get the victory in the end. “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9 NKJV). The grace of Jesus Christ is sufficient—sufficient to cover us, transform us, and help us. You have to take a good, long, hard and honest look at yourself. What role did you play in your drama? I know it’s the other person’s fault—I believe you (haha). But the reality is that two people play a role in the breakdown in any kind of relationship. God is waiting for you to stop telling everyone else and talk to Him about it.
I’m reminded of that drama-ridden time in my life after I ended things; email and texting wars, multiple phone call hang-ups while pretending everything was ok on the job after I had just finished yelling over the phone—it was torture! Just as the singer of the old classic, “What Becomes of the Brokenhearted” is desperate to find peace of mind to mend his heart, I’m reminded that we have access to the Prince of Peace.
Even in the midst of my tears, when my fiancé told me he wasn’t ready to get married, there was a peace that came over me, telling me that I would be alright. Sadly, my destructive patterns didn’t end there. It wasn’t until eight years laterthat my transformation would begin.
When I look back over my life, I see clearly where the enemy tried to kill, steal and destroy me. But the joke’s on him. The thing that was meant to cause me such shame and ruin was a colossal failure. Yes, I was brokenhearted, and even today… being a single mom isn’t easy, but the woman that emerged from the mess is a “sold out” Christian with a deeper relationship with Christ. In my darkest hour, His grace found me. That broken promise escorted me on the road to my destiny!
“This article was first published in Grace Magazine.”
About Kenya Ulmer
Life Coach, Author and Speaker Kenya S. Ulmer had some ugly drama. Now drama-free, she teaches women how to ditch the drama and distractions to get on the road to their destiny. When she’s not slaying drama she’s playing it. Draped in a gold lame jacket, and pounding rock and roll on her piano, she won first place in a talent competition, singing her rendition of Jerry Lee Lewis’ “Great Balls of Fire.” Kenya resides in Maryland with her daughter Sydney—queen of the selfie. You can connect with Kenya at www.singlemamawithnodrama.com