How to Persevere Past the Potholes – Second Part

Posted in Spiritual Growth, Parenting, Life Lessons on October 22, 2015 by Gail Showalter

Let’s talk turkey.  Life is difficult. However, our God is bigger than “difficult.” You can fly like an eagle even if you are a single mother. So how do you handle life’s potholes, pests, and perils?

            You can develop a plan, realize your passion, and pursue power in your life. Then you will not just cope with the problems, you will FLY!


            When pests invade your home or your lawn what do you do? You go after them. You do not allow them to destroy your property. You may call an exterminator. You may go buy chemicals. You do something. You are proactive.

            What do you do with human pests? Maybe a relative, a boss, a colleague, or an ex-husband? Let’s talk more turkey. Some people are difficult. Some are plain nasty. If you want to soar with eagles you must get away from the turkeys.

The following is from Living Learning Loving.When you find yourself in a place where you must deal with nasty people, it helps to identify where boundaries are being breached. Maybe you are the way I was, constantly trying to figure out what the problem was, how to reason with these people, even thinking, What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I work this out? 

            In our world, there are nasty people and the majority of nasty people don’t wear a warning sign, so you can’t see them coming. In fact, most of the nasty people I’ve dealt with are well disguised. In fact, they may not even know they are a nasty person, because this behavior comes from the deepest part of our personality’s emotional needs. Most of us do not have the luxury of simply avoiding them. If they are co-workers, we have to function with them on a professional level. If they are relatives, we are stuck with them, at least occasionally. So what can we do with them?

            First take a step back and disconnect from the emotional turmoil, so you canthink through your reactions and choices. Second, be brave, if all nasties were obvious life would be easier. However, they usually appear to be intelligent, responsible, hard-working people. The nastiness is subtle and well disguised. Nasty may appear to be Nice—at first.

            Associations are important. Most of the time you have a choice about your associates. The old saying is true, “If you lay down with dogs you will get up with fleas.” You may be comfortable staying where you are. You may feel uncomfortable about making changes. Ask yourself is it worth it to stay where your heart is in danger? Your self worth has a great deal to do with how you think of yourself.

Realize Your Passion

            How do you think of yourself? Your passion must be to protect yourself, to be at peace, and to be proactive. As it states in Proverbs 4:23, Above all else, guard your heart for everything you do flows from it (NIV).  Recognize your true identity before God and you will have realized your passion.

            You may download The Christian Identity Confession by Dr. James Mahoney. It is a sure way to build your self worth. I suggest reading it aloud in front of a mirror every day for twenty-one days. I’d be interested in hearing from you about how this changes your life.

To persevere past the potholes of single parenting, remove the pests and realize your passion.

Part 3 of my blog series will address “The Perils of Single Parenting.” Check it out next month! 

About Gail Showalter   

Gail raised three children as a single mother before she remarried. She has experienced the potholes, pests, and perils of being the single head-of-household. As an educator in regular and special education for twenty years she knows a great deal about child development and how to handle kids. She is the founder of SMORE for Women, a nonprofit whose goal is Single Moms, Overjoyed, Rejuvenated, and Empowered. She is a Certified Professional Coach and her stories have been published in several Christian books and magazines. Her book, Living Learning Loving is available on Amazon.