I am going to choose not to share a personal experience this go around. Instead, I’ll start by saying I hate boasting, but I am well-versed in apologizing to my kids!
I’ve found saying “I am sorry” to my kids is a non-negotiable as a parent. At the same time, it’s a part of parenting that can easily be overlooked. It’s hard to admit when you’re wrong or have made a mistake, especially to someone younger than you. But apologizing is a great way for us as parents to model accountability and humility. It can help nurture a strong relationship with our kids all while showing them a valuable life lesson.
I don’t think I need to spend any time explaining to you why apologizing matters. We all know it does. Instead, let’s talk about simple steps we can take to make sure we’re showing our kids what it looks like to apologize well.
● Start with just being real. Don’t make excuses or cast blame. Kids can smell insincerity a mile away, so it’s very important to genuinely acknowledge your mistake and show them you truly mean what you say when you speak those words “I am sorry.”
● Sometimes when we’re apologizing, it’s just as important to listen as it is to speak. Let your child express how your actions made them feel. Show empathy and validate their emotions even when it’s hard to hear.
● Although apologizing is the first step, make sure you follow through. Show actions that demonstrate your commitment to working on your behavior in the future. After all, we know our kids are watching what we do as much as they are hearing what we say.
● Lastly, don’t give up. Keep showing your kids that apologizing is normal. Keep modeling healthy relationships for them to see with your family, friends, and coworkers—and maybe even the person working the drive-thru!
My son recently sent me an incredibly sincere text apologizing for a misunderstanding we had. I can’t begin to explain how proud of him I was. I’m sure I’ve shown him how to apologize but also failed a few times as well. But in that moment, I was reminded just how powerful an apology is. I was able to be the recipient of those powerful words. In fact, I took a screenshot of the text and intend on reminding him just how important that moment was to me.
That’s what this is all about, isn’t it, mommas? It’s about us creating a safe place for little humans to grow up and turn into big humans that make the world a better place. And all of it can start today with three little words. I’ll let you choose if they need to be “I love you” or “I am sorry.”
