“Mom, it’s happening again! She’s just doing everything I do,” my middle daughter said with a look of frustration in her eyes. Her younger sister was picking out her one summer activity, and per the norm, she wanted to do whatever new hobby her older sister had done that year. If your family is like mine, it’s a common conversation in the house about one kid “copying” another and it being annoying. What answer do we always give? “It’s because she thinks you’re cool and wants to be like you.”
Well guess what, single mom? Your kids might not think you’re cool (especially if you have middle schoolers, you’re all too familiar with the eye rolls sent in your direction), but they absolutely are watching and deciding if they want to be like you. So if our ultimate goal is to point them to Christ, and we know they are watching us, what can we do? Imitate Christ.
How can we do this?
1. Make time with God a priority in your own life. I love the command Paul gives us in 1 Corinthians 11:1: “Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ.” The hope is that as they follow you, they will be following Christ. Any chance you have to show your kids that God is a priority to you is a good thing. One way I’ve done this is by purposefully doing my Bible study out in the kitchen where they see me when they’re getting ready in the morning. For older kids,you could have them join you on a Bible reading plan on the Bible app so they can read your comments as you read through scripture together. For younger kids, I’ve heard of moms having a special hat they wear when they’re doing their Bible study. The kids know that when mom has that hat on, they need to give her some quiet so she can pray and read.
2. Let them in on your decision-making processes. Every day we are faced with tons of decisions, both big and small. Walk your kids through why you make decisions based onwhat God says instead of on personal feelings. For example, why do we tithe to the church and how much do we tithe? Why did mom choose to tell the truth even though it would have been easier to lie? Let them do life alongside you and see how you think through things. Will they sometimes be bored of it? Yes. But they do listen, and they do watch.
3. Understand that it’s good for them to know you aren’t perfect. Often, this reality means you’ll be faced with times where you need to apologize to your child. Tell them why you’re sorry and why what you did was wrong. When possible, use scripture to show them. This humble act teaches them we’re not going to be perfect at imitating Christ, but that when we realize we’ve messed up, we apologize and do our best to make it right and move on.
Your children are watching, and praise God they are. What a beautiful opportunity to share Christ with them through your words and actions.
