Acquainted With Our Grief

Over the years I’ve had many friends come and go. Some departures were due to relocations and unavoidable life events. While others, I hate to admit, were due to misunderstandings or hurt feelings. But some friends, even the ones I hardly get to see anymore, are just friends for life. You can go YEARS without seeing each other and when you finally get the opportunity to reconnect, it’s as if you have never been apart. Why is this? I believe it is for one simple reason: you just “get” each other. They are the friends that understand what you’re “saying” even when you’re not speaking. They know when you’re happy, sad, remorseful, shy, angry, fed-up, lazy, energized, and on fire. They even understand WHY you’re that way. They just get it. And when you have a friend like that, it just seems to help you face the impossible with a sense of resolve that we might not otherwise have. Friendships like that are invaluable in this life.

Now I understand that someone might be reading this wishing they had a friend like this in their life right now. We all go through seasons in our lives when we feel alone in our circumstances. Let’s be honest. Sometimes our seasons are just plain tough!

When I was a new single mom, there were times I felt completely alone. While I had the support of family and friends, I just didn’t think anyone could truly relate to my circumstances. No one understood how I felt. Sometimes, I couldn’t even understand what I was feeling! Yet, in the midst of my struggle, a line from an old song I had heard as a kid, kept playing through my mind: “…He was a Man of Sorrows, acquainted with my grief…” I thought, “Jesus knows what I’m feeling!” But…how can this be? He wasn’t a single parent! I scoffed…How can the Creator of the universe remotely understand my feelings toward? He knows me, but that just isn’t the same as…as…GETTING ME. So I began to reflect on all the experiences Jesus had here on earth. And I had to pause. I couldn’t believe it. He KNEW what I was feeling! He WAS (and IS) acquainted with my grief. He had felt everything I felt. He could relate. HE. GOT. ME.

Still not fully convinced?

Let’s take a moment to remind ourselves of how much He “gets us!” 

-He was a step-child.

-He was misunderstood by family, friends, and religious leaders.

– He was mocked…


                                                spat upon…

-Denied by the very ones who should have received Him.

– Betrayed by a “friend.”

– Abandoned in His hour of greatest need

-He was falsely accused.

-He was homeless.

-He was…alone. (Yes, even while surrounded by people most of the time, He was alone.)

Did any of these sound familiar to you? Can you relate? I knew I could. And for the first time in my new journey of single parenthood, I knew that Jesus understood my plethora of feelings. HE GOT ME.

As the years have gone by, friends have come and gone. But one Friend has remained constant. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He never waivers. He doesn’t “get me” today and misunderstand me tomorrow. His feelings towards me don’t change and He NEVER leaves. EVER. He has been my constant companion.

I’ve been able to run to Him when no one else understands. Jesus has been a TRUE friend. One I can rely on, rant to, and trust. Thank you, Jesus, for always being by my side. I couldn’t have done this life without You.

Oh! And I think I just remembered the next line of that old song!

“…He was a Man of Sorrows, acquainted with my grief.  And I will spend all my tomorrows, in humble service at His feet…with the Man of Sorrows…”

Remember…YOU. ARE. LOVED.

About Denise Tornquist   

Denise has been raising her two kids solo for the past 13 years. Her family resides in Oklahoma City with a cat and a dog. She enjoys reading, listening to a variety of music, movies, and meaningful conversations with friends. On a cool fall Friday evening you can find her and her daughter cheering on her son and his high school football team. She also finds great joy in watching her daughter ride horses. Five things she has learned in this single-parent journey is LOVE God, laugh often, learn well, extend love to others and never underestimate the people God has put into your life!! Do life with others…it makes the journey worth it!!